Sibling conflicts are common in all families, but they can be especially complex when one or more children are neurodivergent. Children with neurodivergent conditions—such as ADHD, autism, OCD, or learning disabilities—often face difficulties with interpersonal communication and social interaction. These challenges, including social misunderstandings, emotional regulation difficulties, and communication gaps, can create tension within relationships. However, they also present valuable opportunities for growth and deeper understanding.
Understand What’s Behind the Behavior
A meltdown during a playdate or a fight over sharing toys might stem from sensory overwhelm, a missed social cue, or a need for structure. Interpreting the root cause instead of just the behavior allows for more effective and compassionate support.
Teach Skills, Don’t Just Correct
Instead of saying, “Don’t do that,” guide your child toward what to do. Role-play how to join a game, ask for space, or handle disappointment. Visual supports and social stories can reinforce these skills in a clear and accessible way.
Use Frequent and Specific Praises
Praise is a powerful tool for building children’s confidence and helping them understand what positive social interactions look like, especially when given frequently. Rather than offering vague compliments like “Good job,” be specific about what your child did well. For example, say, “The apology you gave your sister was great — it was clear, sincere, and you made eye contact with her.” This kind of detailed praise helps your child recognize which behaviors to repeat and motivates them to keep practicing these important social skills.
Set Clear Expectations for Siblings
Talk openly about fairness vs. sameness. One child might need noise-canceling headphones or extra time to transition—that doesn’t mean they’re getting “special treatment.” Reinforce that each child is supported in the way they need.
Create Space for Connection
Schedule one-on-one time with each child and create shared family rituals, even if brief. A 10-minute check-in before bed or a weekend walk can help rebuild bonds and reduce resentment
Seek Outside Support When Needed
If conflict becomes chronic or overwhelming, an outside therapist can help mediate sibling dynamics or coach children on navigating social relationships through individual or family therapy.
You’re not alone in these struggles. With intention and support, your family can move from conflict toward connection, even during emotionally intense times.
Social dynamics at home and school can be tough to navigate—but you don’t have to do it alone. Our therapists are experienced in supporting families just like yours.
Contact us today by using this link or call us at (857) 203-0010 to explore therapy options for your child, siblings, or the whole family.
Other Therapy Services Offered at The Bain Health and Wellness Center in Arlington, MA, and Throughout Massachusetts
If you think your child might benefit from mental health treatment, finding the right therapist is key. At Bain Health and Wellness Center, our experienced therapists offer both in-person and virtual therapy for children, teens, and young adults dealing with ADHD, anxiety, autism, depression, trauma, OCD, and more. Every therapist on our team is trained in evidence-based treatments and brings years of experience working with young people. We’re here to listen, discuss your needs, and help you explore the best path forward. Feel free to reach out to us today!
